Sunday, April 13, 2014
Pushing your buttons?
(begun Sunday 13th April at 4.55am)
The Sales Rep from Blue had visited us promptly enough, once the GameWrecker had decided to upgrade our 'security' from an Emergency phone number to an actual alarm system.
I'd snorted with disbelief at the time, and had reminded him of how often Agent Balliram's gate remote appeared to set off our little wirelessed doorbell that's tucked INSIDE our wall up next to the Polo.
Once he's got the frequency for the new alarm, what's to stop him setting it off randomly?, I'd whined... But of course Mr. Logic and Commonsense doesn't buy into any of that mumbo-jumbo, and we were going to carry panic buttons from now on, whether I liked it or not..
Panic buttons that had turned out to be out of stock, by the way, and it had taken Blue's contractor techs quite some time, and a few additional calls to the Rep, before they'd finally arrived to install the alarm.
I'd been sweeping up top a few weeks later, with the device dutifully tucked into my top when.. oh wait, hang on... I've told you this already. How I'd discovered parts of the panic button lying in the bucket of leaves, and he'd had to put it together again? Did I tell you that he'd gone on to swop mine for his, and that the very next day the replacement had fallen out onto the grass in several pieces?
He'd had a meltdown at the time, but had apologised later when he'd discovered that both buttons had a loose screw, and were an accident waiting to happen. Coincidence? Bad luck? Whatever.
He'd taped mine up with insulation tape and had tested them with the Blue alarm control room, and that was that, although I'd pointed out that my actual button on the device was difficult to press, and had sunken right the way into the container.
There'd been the jolly sounds of a family function held out on his front deck last night, but alas, not jolly enough to distract the Superspy from his mischief-making. I'd been bumbling about in the kitchen at 8.25pm with the panic button untouched in my pocket, when our new alarm had suddenly kicked in raucously.. My Shift Monitors at the time could confirm that I'd not so much as blinked at the sound, but had merely smiled knowingly, and gone on with what I'd been doing.
The GameWrecker had come through and had used my device to stop the racket, at which point Blue had rung, and my old man told them it had been a false alarm.
Perhaps I should remind you that no matter how much you spend on fortifying your home, with the access to your powerlines and to the airwaves that the Smart City technology allows your Area Controller, it would be foolish in the extreme to consider yourselves safe from harm.
Alarms may be blocked remotely with ease, giving the criminals just enough time to access your property and carry out their agenda.
Security companies are well aware of the Smart City technology and have apparently been persuaded to work alongside this theft of private information, happily, while creaming a fortune off the backs of unsuspecting customers. Isn't that so Craig?
So there you have it. My Controller has kindly confirmed what I've been telling you all along, and I very much doubt that's the last time our alarm will be interfered with remotely. Had any of our kind and caring neighbours called us when that mind-numbing noise kicked off? Unsurprisingly, no. I'd suggest that at least some of them were already sitting in our home invisibly, and hadn't needed to check that we were okay, as they could see it for themselves...
Old habits die hard, and my Master still clings to his role as Entertainment Manager for his troops, as he plays his dangerous games...
Will your state of the art security system operate as it should when you really need it, or will one of the batteries vital to it's functioning be blocked remotely for just long enough to benefit the home invaders? A game of Russian Roulette that's heightened by the character of the Area Controller chosen to run the quantum technology on YOUR stretch of road, and make no mistake about that.
Still chuckling, Frosty? Why you naughty boy, you!
LATER at 6.14am
Would any of our proud quantum Recruits consider sharing the explicit details of their sorties over the airwaves with daddy dearest, or mommy? Prameet? What about sitting the little woman down, or your hubby maybe, and telling them precisely what it is that your Area Controller insists you participate in, once your family are safely asleep?
The groans of pain emitted from the dog, bleeding at the mouth, had finally disturbed the Owner's sleep to the point where he wanted to be rid of it once and for all. It had so far managed to escape the worst of the laser attacks by sheltering under all the building construction material lying about in the yard, but it had been driven quite mad, and had become feral, just as it's companions had done all that while back. You remember?
Nobby next door at No. 6 had had nowhere to hide, and it had been a simple exercise for Agent Balliram to nuke him to death the night before I was due to take him to the vet.
Not so this other unfortunate creature, although my Master would've given it his best shots...
Happily, my honourable Vice Chair stepped in at my request, and the agonised animal has been captured and put out of it's misery.
You find these allegations impossible to believe? Bollocks! Ask Rezah Isaacs or young Gervaise for that matter, and if they've a shred of decency left, they'd confirm that pets are indeed being used for target practise by the more scurrilous of the quantum Warriors.
Sunday 13th April 2014 at 7.28am