PEERLESS...
(begun Monday 9th April at 9.45am..)

It's 9.40am, and about ten minutes ago, I was busy on the phone, frantically trying to raise Professor Leonard Els, when I heard a ladder being moved in der Bunker passage-way and a bit of hasty banging going on nearby..  Removing, or adjusting the evidence that causes the 'whoomp!' flash, that culminated in our lone power outage, from der Bunker roof? *winks...
I'd spoken with Ms. Dorny again, and she was insistent that I call the Prof. and ask him to come round...
I was originally given the Physics Department at Howard College as his home base, but as usual I got it wrong.. Turns out he heads the Computer Sciences Dept. at the Sleepy Hollow Uni... *blinks...

Having pointed him to my blog and explained that I'd dissed him for years, as a part of the horrific Human Rights Abuse taking place in the name of the Project, he'd be within his rights to avoid me like the plague, though he should know better...   My Controller has just chirruped his remote loudly next door and with it, comes the increased 'tinnitis' and ear pressure.. *yawns...
It's way too soon to consider the sound of a ladder and hasty banging, any indication that Prof. Els might after all, be unaware of the lengths now gone to to torment us.. Is he on first name terms with our Area Controller?  Chances are likely that's a yes.. *eyeroll...

My family are now insisting that I go back to my unfortunate GP for the umpteenth time, while they continue to ignore the fact that my wrist has been savagely radiated, and there ain't no muti on the market to fix it....

LATER at 4.30pm

He called me!   Phew!  Will I ever be able to say I misjudged him badly?  Fingers crossed... Anyway the Professor says he has to come down to Durban some time this week, to visit someone on the Berea whose system is also reacting badly to Metro Connect's fantastique combination of technologies, and he is to try and pop in here and attempt to check out the level of emissions in the valley...
I've no doubt this planned visit is a minor glitch, and that our Area Controller will have a suitable story to cover his behaviour, by the time Prof. Els arrives, if he arrives at all.. *shrugs.. He sent me a mail a while later, and asked tactfully had I considered what we would do if the levels were found to be too high.. Relocate?

LATER at 5pm

I'd been out to refill the bird feeder five minutes ago, when THIS caught my eye.. A roughly shaped cone made out of aluminium foil, aka tinfoil hat, plonked down on top of the ethnic reed made candle holder on my Controller's deck... (Not seen lit even once, since their installation..) Citronella?  I fetched the camera and took a pic and went out again only minutes later, to see it had disappeared... *belches...

As I said, Prof Els is Head of Computer Sciences at the PMB Uni, but I'm betting many of you already knew that.. He must have come down to Durbs. to set up the giant wireless base-station at the Uni of KZN, so I had it the wrong way round as usual... *mutters....

I'd only noticed a month or so ago that the red lights on top of the cellphone mast between Harris and Raftery were active.. They weren't before, and now they're running 24/7... It's a real short mast and no danger to aircraft so..?  May I guess that at the precise moment the suburb was upgraded to Wimax, those mast lights went on and stayed on?

Tuesday 10th May at 5.15am

I was up after 2am for a pee, and noticed straight away that my swollen mitt wasn't aching at all... Instead, I was overwhelmed with the nausea frequency... Up till recently, one of the lesser-used frequencies my Controller employs, but as you'll hear, one he's finding more useful by the day..
I woke again before 4.30am to find the nausea gone, but my good hand's thumb, forefinger, and middle finger, were deader than a dodo... WTF?
As I sit here now, scribbling at the desk after 5am, he's got the nausea back up and running again.. Part of the latest cunning plan, Baldric?

I'd replied to Professor Els' kind email to the effect that, were he to find the levels of EMR too high in this area, he would have to include at least four other families in his recommendation to relocate... (wrong, as it's actually three definites that I know of, not four).
None of them have the means to up stakes and move...
Zain?  You're always looking for a good story, and I guess this would make an excellent Gazette front page?  In fact, if all our weird matching symptoms were published, who knows but that a tidal wave of similarly afflicted victims would emerge from the shadows?

Despite feeling rather low, I bummed a lift up to last night's CPF Meeting and I didn't regret it, though halfway through, I suffered a brief but acute bout of Knives to the bad Wrist, that had my eyes watering.. Couldn't resist, could you Balliram?  *teeth...
Turns out our Metro Connect, Sherwood Network, Area Controller, has been flooding our Vice-Chair's home with the nausea frequency as well, and he was decidedly under the weather as a result.. Well done, o Cowardly One!   *one-handed clap....
Outside, after the Meeting, I'd casually asked one of our members whether he was on Metro Connect and he'd replied in the affirmative... I guess the same applies to a good many of the people that regularly attend our CPF, does it not?
He has a young family and plans to emigrate anyway, so hopefully Dodge City and Nayager's eavesdropping efforts won't affect him at all....
I feel like shit right now, and hopefully will get back to you later.. *staggers off...

LATER at 5.10pm..

It's been a fairly pleasant afternoon, but it's over with a jolt, with the sudden arrival of the ubiquitous heatwave, pains to the wrist and 'tinnitis'.. A chirrup, and guess who's home?  *sighs...
I'd had a fairly hilarious visit to my GP at noon, as the Eavesdroppers will testify.. He more or less expects me to behave like a loon, so natch, I oblige.. *grins...
I guess I was just busy telling him about Colonel Groenewald from Dramat's Special Unit, dressing up in the Technical Services uniform for a couple of months at the San, when all of a sudden the frequency in my ears changed dramatically... I was almost standing under the GP's aircon unit at the time so, no surprises there..*winks..
Seems these days that aircon units both indoors and out, can be made a home to all manner of interesting additional devices, hey Balliram?  *grins...

By the time my poor doc ushered me out of his rooms, you could tell he'd rather be signing papers to have me committed, than see me again anytime soon.... Man, if there's one skill and one skill only, that I can lay claim to, it's being offensive, and I defy you to find my match... *snorts...

Wednesday 11th May at 4.45am..

I suspect this blog now reads like some boring medical chart, clipped to the foot of an ailing pensioner's sickbed.. There's a pervasive smell of disinfectent and illness in the air, and it's time for the queasy among you, to move on... In 2 or 3 short weeks, the tide has turned so completely that I can barely waddle with the amount of my own words that I've been forced to stuff down my gullet... *sighs..
Nonetheless and notwithstanding, I owe you an update on my Controller's current genius, albeit with more than a little help from his friends...*Javascript: Void? U bet!* 

The runoff pouring down Jan Smuts yesterday, as we arrived back from the GP?  I'd spoken to Missus Bernie early in the morning and she'd said that Flame Lily had all their cottage water lines replaced during the week, and that the wekkers were just finishing off refurbishing the communal servant's quarters toilets and showers... That would neatly explain the clear signs of water still visible on the little by-road outside Carol's empty house at No. 734, and Sue the Book's mum's cottage below that.... The huge river of water had by then begun pouring out of the bank onto Jan Smuts itself...
To their credit, once I'd reported it to the official Fault line, it must have been switched off quite promptly, as by 3pm it wasn't running down the road...

Still, a two or three hour runoff would have taken some of the pressure off the over-stuffed water lines, and is not to be sneezed at, right Mr. MacLeod? 
I spent an interesting evening, acutely aware of the newly prescribed anti-inflammatory competing with my Controller's regular reminders of just who owns whose body parts, and without a doubt, Balliram won that battle...
At several points overnight, I woke to feel my Master toying with my damaged limb, and after 2am I was seized with the oddest paroxym (sp) of coughing that I can remember... *eyeroll  Simply too weird to lay at the Genius' door, I'd have to say that decades of puffing on cancer sticks caught up with me, and had me gasping for air... *shrugs...

When I finally staggered off Cloud 9 just after 4am, it was to a niggling pain at the base of my spine.. Your next target o Brilliant Controller of my Life?  *curious... I note that there is still swelling visible on my unfortunate appendage, and would guess that Balliram's overnight attentions successfully routed any results the new medication may have achieved... Apparently my next visit is destined to be to an orthopaedic surgeon (sp), and after that to a rheumologist (sp).. Bullied into a stream of exercises in utter futility by my anxious daughter, I dutifully bleed my Discovery allowance dry... *shrugs...

Do I await Professor Els' promised arrival with his emission measuring device, with bated breath?  My inherent cheerfulness fails me at this point, and reality kicks in.. I do not, and I suspect that kind though he may be, he will find more important things suddenly require his attention..*shrugs..
To those disturbed individuals who continue to get twisted pleasure from the dying gasps of an inveterate loudmouth, (that would of course include my own Area Controller and now, quite possibly a Colonel Groenewald of the Hawks), I hope I don't disappoint you... *waves..

Peace julle..

---oOo---

Wednesday 11th May 2011 at 8.59am...