LIGHT MY FIRE....

(begun Tuesday 4th August at 4.55am...)

It turns out I AM being of some use to the OldBoys Network after all, though not quite in the way I'd hoped...*grins... I've held my position as Retard of the Decade, and continue to distract and amuse the Brighter classes endlessly... Sure, I've told you facts that the Courageous Couple would rather I'd not shared with you, but how easily they would've refuted my claims...*shrugs...
When I finally, in idiot fashion, managed to pull up the real MyBB last night, what did I do but send an incoherent message to the site owner...*sighs...More entertainment for the Intellectuals ja...

Would rpm put me down were I to request it? Seriously? Has he time to be bothered? Would he even reply to such a request? Would he prefer I find another forum? There is no other, as far as I'm concerned... I guess I've made that fairly obvious despite the efforts made to move me...
Thicko that I am, I'm as bewildered today as I was ten years ago....*roffels.. Am I on a par with the peurile street name changes? A distraction for those that otherwise might show more of an interest in what's being attached to the poles right outside their homes? To their power systems dipping visibly and frequently? Are they stupid enough to think being IT friendly precludes their privacy being violated? *snorts...
How do they justify the increasing number of unexplained electrical fires? With the ubiquitous 'these things happen'? *falls over... Not so bright then after all....

LATER at 6.10am...

*It's 8.52pm as I type this and a banner has just appeared at the top of the page saying ERROR while another under the window says Could not contact Blogger.com..... Wassup Bali? Problems? *

I was later than usual going onto the verandah, and was treated to a whole range of different sounds as a result...*grins..

It had been 4.15pm yesterday as I'd watched the last rays of the sun lifting the convent base station from it's tatty uncared-for appearance to something vaguely mediterranean and beautiful... Was my Master bored at the time? A light appeared just above the concrete pathway below the kitchen windows and grew so bright despite the sunshine, that it was obviously an SE of some magnitude! Yellow, not orange and wait! There was another, which came on what looked to be the outside of the Recreation Centre....They grew incredibly bright and then gradually faded before getting bright again... Testing? Portalights? I've never seen those particular lights activated before...*fascinated...

I took Sophie out after 8.00pm and dear Captain Courageous was running a truly rough version of the Wireless Song, doubtless for my benefit...*curtseys to the Cabbage....

To judge someone's character from a thumbnail picture on the internet is about as stupid as you can get...*grins... He's only ever been kind to me despite that he is fully aware of my *coughs* position... Would he be sufficiently kind to administer the coup de gras were I to ask? *rubs its burning eyes.... (No doubt the current Bushdwellers have a fire going somewhere) Hell, they shoot horses don't they? *cackles...

Did Dixie (charmer that she surely is) arrive on MyBB as a professional detractor? A happy soul in a great and stable relationship, with kids to adore, she was still persuaded to take the task on, despite that I've managed unaided, to do a better job than she could ever accomplish? *snorts... At what point did my Master adopt the open door policy again on our PC and why? *curious... Along with the riff-raff (no offence Sweetie, but from the getgo crass would be the word applicable), I will continue to hope that among our invited 'visitors' are those few who are having second thoughts, despite the damning evidence....

Were it possible for me to issue my own invites, I would place rpm, bwana, the Record Player and even the Poisonous Rabbit on my list of invitations... Yes, the same Baggage Handler that rates Dimwits very near the top of his own hate list. The Rabbit too is fairly savage, but the thing is they are HONEST ... A rare commodity in my travels ....A pipe dream it will remain as there would surely be no rsvps returned in my direction.... *staggers on regardless....
I owe it to rpm to go quietly... for all that I've been no more than a figure of fun and have brought out the very worst in so many otherwise *coughs* well-adjusted people, he has tolerated my continued presence... Is he even aware that my Master uses FANGIRLS now to do his dirty work?
More to the point would be, does he care? *grins.. Were he to contact me and request that I leave, how could I be sure the missive came from him and not the skirts my Chicken King currently hides behind? I couldn't...*shrieks... Round and round we go....

LATER at 7.45am..

Again the house alarm goes off briefly as they leave... I blink and the 4x4 is back on the drive... Does Missus C know he was coming straight back? Sweet Dixie single-handedly made a mockery of my assertions that I grow stronger every day...*purple...
Am I as unbalanced as my detractors would have you believe? Shh! NO SHOUTING!!!

Silly as it is to cling to straws, I just found a text on my cell that came in silently a while ago...*looks at the vodacom representative living next door.... Sure, it's a round robin and will have been sent to many, but it's enough to get me smiling again... A straw that will keep me afloat in this muddy morass I find myself in today... Ask him. *shrugs..

Missus C said that Bali called the cops and they came and picked up the loiterer outside B.Snr's gates the other day... No, I didn't get it wrong either. That's pretty much exactly what she said though suspicious looking guy would probably be nearer the mark.... Tell me then why, if my Network Admin (*and again I am informed now that I've lost the connection to blogger.com.*) would have you believe he is in any way anxious about his home security, does he not repeat the exercise with the lurkers I've reported here that hang out over by the orange crate under the gumtrees?

Why does the SAPS bakkie fail to appear and several officers emerge to search that small area and move the bushdwellers on? Selective anxiety perchance? *chokes... Bali is aware that those guys have a perfect view of all of our comings and goings and yet his burst of civic duty has deserted him? *teeth.... (*wheeeee! The heat coming off the Monitor at this point is ludicrous!!!!!*) The pseudo bird-call sounds nearby and means exactly what? A visitor to the camp set up in the bush across the way? Another change of clothing being delivered? A re-charged cellphone? *winks....

LATER at 9.30am

I'd glanced up in passing just before 9.00am to find the 4x4 gone again. *shrugs and yawns...

LATER at 10.40am

Now there's the thing... I just went inside for a drink and looked across the valley to see a guy again sitting on the orange crate, but with something shiny in his hands.... I called the GW to come see and then I fetched the binocs... Just in time to see the bloke pick up the crate and move smartly along the edge of the drop until he was out of sight behind the trees...There he remains... Did someone see me heading inside and call the guy, to move him? That crate hasn't shifted in a week, why suddenly now? Does my Master know that I'm curious about their continued presence in full view of his property? This guy is wearing an unmissable bright yellow and brown top and he's left items lying under the gumtree in his scramble to become invisible...*cackles..

It's like there's always been a bushdweller or GateKeeper hanging about in the valley and they don't bother me at all... But it will be interesting to see whether my Network Admin is serious about his security being breached or whether yesterday's performance was just that...*beams...
Is he to have another 'theft' so hot on the heels of the last, merely to prove that his Insurers are happy to continue paying him out, and that there was never the hint of a scam involved in any of the burglaries occurring on his property? *winks... Why not?

LATER at 5.05pm

Their house alarm went off again at 2.00pm and again I called Missus C. At my first attempt the line rang a couple of times and was dropped (fixed line) and I tried again and said aloud that Bali should connect the call or look like a Fool.. Some noisiness later and it went through.... geez louise! *laughing...
See now, I watched eight minutes later as Nobby barked warningly at the top gates. Nobody came into view, least of all ADT Security. Apart from their latest 'theft', when I walked with the Security guy around their house, I've yet to see them enter the property. How do they get in? Do they have a key? *makes a note to enquire...

The Twins squeal now at the top gates... As my Controller appears outside in the street they turn and run back down the drive. He leaves the gates standing open and pretends to fiddle with them. I'm enchanted by the fleeting thought that ALL this nonsense with the alarm is to somehow explain his behaviour the night before, while I was online... Surely NOT! *laughing again... Does he say there was a glitch in his system and that's why our iBurst connection was dropped up to five times? Does he? *chokes... Why did Missus C feel the need for the phonecall about the two texts I sent her asking if I could return the Twins? Why would she ask if I'd sent the texts from a PC FFS? She knows I don't. A silly slip on her part and more likely that her Charmer held them back and only mentioned them the next morning, so she had to scramble for a story.... *sighs...

The matter of mon Capitano having such total control over my fixed line and cellphones is a whole 'nother story hey Jannie? Wanna chat?

Peace

---oOo---

Tuesday 4th August 2009 at 9.42pm.